Wednesday, 12 June 2013

I scream you scream we all scream for...


This is Sabrina. Sabrina likes ice cream.

Sabrina likes ice cream so much she ordered four.

Which is minimal really, especially when you've just had to look like a right fatty ordering eight portions of fish and chips and sixteen sachets of ketchup.

Lucky that we were on a main fashion trip to Brighton (who needs Barbados) and weren't actually eating all of this ourselves. Well, not today anyway.  

Global Championships with Massimo Dutti

Salmon en croute, smoked salmon...and my first ever oyster on one plate. Most fishy meal ever? Avec champers, obvs. Well it was Harrods catering...darling. Also walked past the kitchen and spotted a massive tub of Philadelphia...confirmation for me that cream cheese is the height of poshness.

Friday, 3 May 2013

Joe & The Juice

New fave juice bar in Soho. Made even better by cock-sure London Fields style staff - loafers with no socks? Massive hair that looks undone but really took an hour? In a band? you know it. Bet that fruit aint organic though is it. Cups not recyclable either. East London fail. Juice win!

Fatty Fashionista

Welsh Rarebit. That's cheese on toast. And a poached egg. (Token salad). All before 10am. Bloated ain't the word.

Tuesday, 30 April 2013

Dehesa With Office

The lovely Office girls (Minus Tobie) took myself, Ridge and Eggenberger out for a delightful dine at Dehesa tonight.

Now the problematic thing about tapas is that it is near on impossible to remember what you've ordered. I believe we had chicken, tortilla, some scallops, a beetroot cheese thing, chorizo, some prawn ball things, followed by chocolate truffles, goats milk panacotta and choc brownie. A glowing foodie review I feel.

Who cares what it was, it was delicious and the company was top notch too. Literally never spent so much time talking about boys. (Last statement is of course an absolute grade A lie).

Thanks Office! X

Sunday, 28 April 2013

Afternoon Tea With Push PR

After a tough day of shooting style file, Push PR treated me to a delightful afternoon tea at the Soho Hotel.

Push PR have been worried about me of late, on account of the fact they have not seen or heard of me for about 6 months. Nothing personal of course, I'm very busy and not that important.

Excellent sandwiches, too much cake and so much tea I felt sick - just as the perfect afternoon tea should be. Brilliant catch up too, 3 hours of solid gossip. See you in another 6 months gals, I'm going back to chain myself to my desk.

Monday, 22 April 2013

Lazy Bones With Miss S and DP

I love a Phillip Green sponsored dine, they're always reliable for taking us to the newest coolest places and for having the best gossip.

This time we went to Lazy Bones, an American diner type place in Farringdon. Pulled pork burgers and cheese smothered fries were a speciality, the cocktails were delish, and I loved how you could design your own popcorn flavours with their flavour shakers.

Hannah Gale talked a lot about her sex life and about the time she appeared in FHM. She was a high street honey then and she's a high street honey working for LOOK now...some things never change.

Thanks PG! X

Fashion Snacks

Any person who works in fashion and is skinny is obviously mean to their interns. Check out this loot, given to us a thank you from LOOKs amazing interns.

Now get back in the cupboard and do the returns. And make me a cup of tea and open my post while you're at it.

Greg Hunting

He flirted with us all at his diabolical restaurant in Borough and requested Jodie partake in phone sex. Deary me I've missed Greg Wallace.

So on Saturday we went GW hunting at his restaurant in Putney.

Food wise, it was a vast improvement on the Borough branch, not a strawberry jus/crumble sprinkle in sight, and instead lovely fresh salads, home made quiches, delish chicken kebabs...much better.

Sadly, there was no sign of the man himself, however the obligatory win a date with Wallace cards were still on the tables. The lengths that man will go to for a date is beyond me. And no I didn't fill the cards out with Jodie's name (again).

Saturday, 6 April 2013

Aintree Ladies Day With Matalan

Tan, spanx, ladylike dress, heels, proper make up and a fascinator - us LOOK girls were showing those scousers how it's done yesterday. I even made my eyebrows extra defined for the occasion, hello scouse brow.

This was my inspiration.

The day began drinking champers in first class on the train up to Liverpool. At 8.30am.
Good start.

We watched a great Matalan fashion show, placed some bets, watched some races, lost some money, oh and drank a lot of champagne and wine.

On the menu was smoked salmon with a mini Bloody Mary - we were unsure what drinking etiquette was most appropriate given the mini size, and settled on just knocking it back. Then we had stuffed chicken breast with veg and lastly the most amazing raspberry topped lemon panacotta with chocolate ice cream. And just in case we were still hungry, we had afternoon tea too. Although instead of tea we just drank wine out of the tea cups, we weren't fooling anybody.

On the train home we drank yet more wine out of mugs, so by the time we arrived into Euston at 8.20pm, and after a 12 hour drinking stint, I was unsurprisingly worse for wear. I was subsequently put to bed by Sam, who was eagerly awaiting my arrival after having to rescue me from the streets of Marylebone. A bad end to an amazing day. Thanks Matalan! Sorry Sam.


Monday, 1 April 2013

Pasta Making

No pasta machine? No problem. An ideal way to roll out your pasta is by using your feet. On the kitchen floor. Environmental health would be proud.

Sunday, 3 February 2013

India - night 1

So non blog has inspired me to get back in the blogging saddle. Sorry eichler, youve been holding the fort for far too long.

Me, the hippy and still got it, never lost it wanless, hit cafe del mar, which was not iN the costa del sol as it sounds but in varkalaaaaa, keralaaaaa, indiaaaaaaa ( later to be the only lyrics of the fat hippies bongo chants)

The food was off da hook deeeeeelish, we had king prawn tandoori, fish korma and fish jalfrezi with raitha (my new fave yoghurt dish) accompanied by garlic naan and rice,

oh and a smaaaall side of chips.. Whatevs, don't judge.

Even my fragile stomach had no problems, gutted, looks like ill have to do project rexi the proper way. Grrrrrrr. #tapwateranyone?

With full bellies we hit the rock and roll bar, with the customary bottle of spike, I mean water. After a couple of Vod oranges, everyone became good looking? Weird that. Who knew we had such a penchant for the locals?! Still getting those whassap's Hannah?

They even let us put our own iPods on, which was fine until Dolly Parton 'jolene' came
On and the dance floor cleared. #embarr #mumsongs.

And then we safetly (don't read mum) got a lift home with Craig David and a hottie from mile
End #whatarethechances?#homefromhome

While we listened to gangster rap and swigged whiskey out the bottle. #holdmeback #toozeeexxxytoohandle

Still managed to get up in time for a run along the beach and yoga. Ahhhhhh this is the life.
Til next time Nellist.

Ps, how many Xmas decorations are too many??

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Shirley valentines last Indian supper

Greetings from Kerela, yep non-blog has come out of the hippy woodwork for a one off India special.

After a week in paradise with batweasel and 'Got her mojo back' Nellist I ended my hols (yep this was a proper holiday, not one paid for by IPC) with this veg thali, costing a whopping £1.30- Gotta watch the rupee's now we're jobless eh.

The scene is set, we're eating off banana leaves in a little hut, all very Spititual apart from we're listening to Snoop Dog and i'm dancing like the mother f-ing D.O double Geeee #embarrasingmumstyle #whocareswe'redangeranimals

But this taste sensation was the perfect meal to end to my indian style day, spent barefoot (havianna breakage), fashioning myself a homemade turban to avoid sunstroke, whilst riding on the back of 20 year olds motorbike #propershirleyvalentinemoment.

And after 5 weeks in India, with a suitcase full of spices (and xmas decorations random I know but you'll be jels next December) I can safely say I still NOT bored of curry. It is by far the greatest food on earth.

Until next time
Peace, love, bongo's and happiness
Non blog x

Friday, 18 January 2013

Christmas With Jamie Oliver

OK so I didn't actually spend Christmas with JO, but boyfriend of the year (2013 anyway) did get me a cooking lesson at JO's cookery school in Notting Hill as my Christmas present!

Because Sam loves any form of food encased in tortilla wraps, (Nando's is his Mecca) he chose the Mexican street food course, and it was brilliant. We got a glass of wine on arrival (drinking whilst cooking = winner) and had a private lesson with one of JO's chefs called Colleen who taught us to make chicken tacos with a sticky chipotle chilli sauce. She even offered me a childs apron. How sweet of her.

Nevertheless, here is the recipe.


2 teaspoons whole cumin
2 teaspoons dried oregano
1 large dried chilli
4 cloves garlic - peeled
8 chicken thighs on the bone
Olive oil for frying
3.5 cups passata
2 tablespoons white wine vinegar
1 heaped dessert spoon castor sugar
100gms chipotle chilli sauce
4 flour tortiallas
2 baby gem lettuce - washed & leaves picked off
2 - 3 limes
Small bunch of fresh coriander
1 red onion - thinly sliced
2 large tomatoes
2 strips spring onion - thinly sliced on an angle

For The Gorditas

250g masa harina (or fine cornmeal)
30g baking powder
20g plain flour Pinch of salt
300ml hot water Plain flour for dusting
Oil for frying


Put the cumin, oregano, dried chilli and garlic into a small blender and whizz up. Lightly oil the chicken and season with salt and pepper, then take 1⁄2 your dry seasoning mixture and rub into the chicken all over. Add a lug of olive oil to a large pan and when the oil is hot fry the chicken on both sides until golden brown.
Turn the heat down and add in the passata, vinegar, sugar, chipotle chilli sauce and the remaining dry seasoning mixture. Turn the heat to low, put a lid on the pan and simmer the chicken until cooked through. This should take about 20 - 25 minutes, depending on how big your chicken is. Check it is cooked before removing from the heat. Your sauce should be thick and sweet, if not remove the chicken and put the pan back on the stove and reduce the sauce until it is thick and sticky.
To assemble your taco: Remove chicken from the sauce and pull all the meat off the bone, discard the bones. Lay your flour tortillas out flat on a board spread on about a tablespoon of the thick sticky chipotle sauce, then add in your cooked chicken, spoon over some of Jamie’s Mexican Salsa Verde, then 2-3 baby gem leaves, sprinkle over some picked coriander leaves, some lime juice, chopped tomatoes, sliced red onions and the sliced spring onions. Roll up tightly then cut in half and enjoy eating.

For the gorditas, put the masa harina and salt together in a large bowl and make a well in the centre. Mix the baking powder into the hot water and pour this into the well. Using a fork, mix the masa harina into the liquid and when it starts to come together use your hands to knead it.
Divide the dough into 14 or so equal squash-ball-sized pieces and dust them lightly with flour.
Roll each piece around in your hands, then pat and flatten into a small round roughly the size of the base of a wine glass. Put these on an oiled tray, dust with a little flour and put aside until ready to fry. Fry within 1 hour of making.

Now I won't lie Sam does lose boyfriend points for failing to arrange a meet and greet with the man himself, but it was a totes pukka xmas present.
Most enjoyably it proved that Sam does not in fact have a photographic memory because he kept forgetting the method. Amateur. Although he has been arrested before so perhaps that might land him a job at Fifteen.

Merry Christmas! x

Sunday, 6 January 2013

An Amish New Year

Apologies to both eichler and whatdidyouhaveforetealastnight fans, yes that's you mum. We've all been tres slack of late and the little German one has been holding the blogging fort solo.
Actually don't feel too bad for her, she lives for this shit, well this and finding catwalk copies for under 3 quid.
So to break the blogging drought, we had to come back with a cracker and what a cracker it was. The twine held its annual party, last year it was onsies, this year we went Amish. Turns out it was the easiest fancy dress evs #toomuchchoice #mywholewardrobelookslikethat

Yes that is a bra on Kate's head and a Claire's accessories hair bobble wrapped round jakes face. #resourcefulcouple.
To start the bash me and Taff were given the breakfast course. Now Taff LOVES a scotch egg. #askjones so I got señor bro to come up with a recipe, the full English scotch egg. We did a trial run which I wasn't allowed to touch, incase I ruined it. Oh the confidence.
Roll sausage meat with chives

Fill with mushrooms, baked beans, mushrooms, tomatoes and fried off pancetta. Soft boil eggs and place in a line.

Roll into a massive sausage, seal then put I to the oven for 20 min.

Serve with homemade tomato sauce

Me and Taff recreated for the feast, he was sous chef, I was bossy. he'll probably never cook with me again. But at least we pulled it off in the end!

Et voila, it got the highly regarded Andrew's classic claim of 'restaurant quality' (she does say this ALOT)
We then exchanged gift, which Hendo lucked out on.. I mean who wouldn't want tattoo sleeves and an earpiercing gun?!

We almost managed to get a couple in the lobes too- that is before he wimped out like a girl after looking searchingly at jones for her approval.
The next course was Willmore and 'queen of the sides' jones. Now to be completely honest I had full confidence in jones' sides #cookingqueen #hasselbacks but wasn't quite sure that the snake could match. After Kate's threat, 'you better not fuck it up, we spent £40 on that beef' the pressure was on. And he did not dissapoint. The best beef Wellington I've ever had! Actually I've never had one before but it was goooood. Well Done Willmore

We then played an epic Xmas quiz made by Taff and moved onto desert, I have no pics of Kate and hendos crumble ...but it was yum nonetheless, And when I say Kate and Hendos I mean Kate's ... He was in charge of custard #heboughtit #copout.
We were joined by jill, Laurie, Mygdal and former housemate lynne #sobsob, necked jones' homemade limoncello and then hit the pub in our Amish attire.
Well not completely Amish, Mygdal insisted on wearing with sequinned leggings.. Well a gals gotta be zeeeeexy

After getting a few weird looks, branded racists and asked why we had tea towels on our heads.. Whatevs, losers. We headed home to see in the new year at the Twine.

The best new year evs, who knew religion could be so fun? Jones probably. Can't wait for next year. Fancy dress suggestions most welcome .......
Over and out
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